Om Nom Nom Girlfriend!?!!

This is Tristan, The Moleclue Monster

...... OF DEATH!

Fear him.

Love him.

Look forward to seeing many, many photophucked pictures of him.

Anyway, I have decided that my timeline is complete crap. Which means that it must be fixed! Obviously. Hahaha. Ummmm, I haven't completely finished fixing it yet, but I'll show you what I have so far. But why post about it before I'm done fixing it? Because, I started typing this stupid post nearly a week ago, thinking that I would have the stupid thing finished by now, and it's starting to drive me a little insane!?!! And that is why I am posting my brand new, totally fabulous, incomplete timeline. Deal with it. Hahaha.

............

Moving right along,

-Emma is three years old when she gets seperated from her family.

-Fouteen years Later-

-Seventeen years old now, Emma returns Home.

-Four years Later-

-Emma and Angel turn twenty one and Kerian starts a war for the throne.

-A couple months Later-

-Serena is born!

-Three years Later-

-Kerian is brought back from the Dead! Angel gets stabbed and poisoned and just generally maimed and then she's crowned Queen of Zarius!

-About a year Later-

-Zareck is born! And Angel and Krys get married.

-Four years Later-

-Serena is eight years old! And Zareck is four! Yay, happy family! Then Kikyo comes along and kidnaps Serena and Eclipse intending to kill them and steal their powers for herself. Sounds like fun, right?

.................

Hahahha. Yea. so That's the main plot line. I'll post again about Blaise and the RoQuero'Kubeh, and Nicademus and Kai's plotlines. Ya know, after I stop procrastinating and finish them. Hahaha.

......................

But speaking of Blaise! I have decided that he needs to be older. I think that I had originally had him being only a year or two older then Eclipse, which would make him twenty two, twenty three years old. And just recently, like literally ten minutes ago, I decided that a year or two is not enough. So, I think I'll have him start off at like twenty seven or so. Kay? So, when Emma is seventeen and Eclipse is twenty one, Blaise shall be twenty seven! Which sounds like a much better plan to me at the moment, but who knows? I could change my mind. Hahaha.

...................................

GOOD DAY MY FRIENDS!?!!

I Rock and I Ramble, My Brain is Scrambled

Okay, so, the other day when I was sitting in Math class, totally paying rapid attention to each and very single word out of the Professor's mouth, like ya do, I had a series of life altering Revelations about my book! Mostly to do with Kikyo and Kiska, but still, LIFE ALTERING! Hahaha. Now, I'ma share them with you, my semi loyal followers and fans.

-Firstly! I have decided that I absolutely hate Kazuo with grey skin. I hate it! Why did you people let me think that THAT was a good idea? Hahaha. So, needless to say, Kazuo shall return to being practically Albino.

-And I have decided to switch Kikyo and Kiska's parts in my book. Kikyo will now be the one kidnapping my husband and daughter and Kiska will be Kerian's daughter/Xanathos's sister. Although I have decided that Kiska's name MUST be changed asap, as I have recently decided that I hate it. OH SO MUCH HATE FOR THAT NAME ALL OF A SUDDEN! Hahaha. I'm leaning toward Selene or Demona, right at this moment, but that could very well change.

Yea. But I've just decided that the character of Kikyo, is far too maniacal and evil to be a pawn in Adrienne's plans like Xanathos is. She deserves to be a major villain. And really, considering on who she is based, is that really that much of a surprise? I don't think so. Anyway, I don't plan to change either of their powers, the girls are just going to swap. And I'm going to redo both of their character references. Because in addition to Kiska's name, I've decided that I hate both of their faces. Hahaha.

-And! I have also decided to change Kikyo's motive for kidnapping Eclipse and Serena. I mean, althought her previous motives did suit my purposes perfectly, they weren't exactly original. Or even particularly interesting. So, they MUST be changed. And I have decided to go with the 'Power Seeker' motivation. Basically, I chose this one because I wrote a short story about a BILLION and a half years ago about Blaise and Vlad, (There's a real surprise, right?) and althought the story sucked I always loved the concept and the way those particular villains operated. So, I'm going to adapt Kikyo's motives to fit this concept. And the best part? I don't have to change anything to fit this cool new motivation. (Hahaha. It's the Jacob Motivation!) All I have to do is add some stuff. Which shouldn't be too bad. I mean, all I have to do is make up a legend and create some kind of weapon or a talisman, a spell, something that will absorb and transfer the power of the people that you kill with it. But I'll brief you some more on that some time in the future. Right now, it's almost completely irrelevant.

-Also! I have decided that it is not conceivable, not even for a Vaikas of Angel's super impressive stature to have fully healed from a such critical injury, inflicted with a poisoned blade within the day or two it takes Adrienne to take over the castle. So, because Angel is a tough, die hard bitch, she will be in the final fight scene of Book Two, and she will kick ass. However, she will not be nearly as impressive as she generally is. I'm also thinking of having her rip out all of the stitches that Krystal so kindly fixed her up with in the process of kicking ass.So, expect to see my beloved sister COVERED IN BLOOD!?!!?!!! At some point during the battle, or perhaps after das battle scene. Hahaha.

-And, I have decided that instead of letting Adrienne escape during the chaos and confusion of the battle at the end of Book two, that she shall be captured and deported to Tethys along side Selene/Demona and Xanathos. And then within days of being there, the troop can run into Kikyo and Kikyo shall cut down Adrienne and steal her power and then recruit Selene/Demona and Xanathos into her army of minions hell bent on WORLD DOMINATION!?!! Hahahaha! And why the hell not? Xana is a Power Hungry Monster with an Inferiority Complex. And Selene/Demona will want revenge. Particularly on Angel, because no body gets away with treating her that way. NO BODY! Hahahha. Yea right, Selene/Demona. Whatever.

Killer Tofu!

And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, prepare yourselves to witness,

The FANTASTIC Adventures of CAPTAIN ELF BOY and BUBBLY CAT GIRL!?!!

In TECHNICOLOR 3D!?!!

But without pictures,

Because I am far too lazy for to be making SIMS right at this moment,

But instead I have....

Umm.... CAPS LOCK!?!!!

YAY

LOCKS THAT ARE CAPPED!

OHHH MOST VICTORIOUS VICTORIES!?!!

Hahahahaha!

Anyway....

..............

So, as you may or may not know, I have a cute, new boyfriend!?!! His name Tim, but I call him, Princeling. Because he seriously looks like he belongs in Lord of The Rings. I mean, I swear to gawd, he looks just like a freakin Elf! And so far, I think that he's kinda perfect. ^/////^ But let's not get into that right now.... Hahahaha.

..............

Alright so the other night, we were discussing his natural talents not only for being super sweet and charming, but for being able to turn me into a giggling, exceptionally feminine, bubble headed fool each and every time he says something sweet AND for being able to time such sweet, charming comments so that just when I am FINALLY getting to the point where I can stop smiling and giggling like a stupid School Girl, HE DOES IT AGAIN!?!! Hehehe.

....................

Well, actually, maybe discussing is the wrong word. I was accusing him of being able to do all of these things. Which obviously he can. Obviously! Then we decided that because he has these MYSTICAL powers over me, that he must be A SUPER HERO! And I admit that the fact that I even suggested such a thing, was greatly influenced by Eddie Izzard and his "I have Decided to Associate with Super Heros" rant, but that is really irrelevant to my point now isn't it? Hahaha. So, at first he was skeptical. Thinking that he would be a lame super hero if he had powers such as these. But I convinced him otherwise with a response that said THIS!?!!

..............

Random Citizen: Oh help us Captain Elf Boy! We need a girly female for some baizarre reason and we're fresh out! Whatever shall we do!?!!

Captain Elf Boy: No problem Random Citizen! -turns to me- Liz! You are a cute little Cat Girl and I love you more then my new video games!

Bubbly Cat Girl: Awwww! <3>

Random Citizen: Thank you Captain Elf Boy! You've saved the day!?!!

.................

More or less. Hahaha. I changed some of the words and added a bit more description to make it sound just a bit less retarded. But yea, TADA!?!! And earlier today we decided that Captain Elf Boy and Bubbly Cat Girl's ARCH RIVALS are, Drum Roll please... EMO NINJAS!?!! Yesh! The most evil of evil, EMO NINJAS! Whoose soul purpose in life is too destroy the world by cutting off all of Captain Elf Boy's hair and forcing Bubbly Cat Girl to wear skinny jeans!?!!

-gasp-

>_<

......The Horror! THE HORROR!?!!

Hahaha. And the best part? Princeling is an artist! And I haven't seen any of his work yet, but I bet it's FANTASTIC! And I think that we should turn this into a comic book/strip/whatever! Because even if we were the only ones who got it/thought it was funny, it would still kick major bootahy!

..................

And my Blog is doing that annoying thing that its does sometimes where it respaces everything that I've typed all by itself simply because it can.... RAGE!

Bazinga!?!!

So, a number of hyper amusing things have happened to me in the last week or so, which I believe to be the Universe's way of trying to make up for screwing me over again and again and again in basically every aspect of my life. And I have decided to share them with you!?!! Or at least a few of them. This post would just go on and on and on FOREVER if I told you everything. And to be honest, even if it wouldn't go on and on forever, I still probably wouldn't tell you everything, because Ima a raging Brat-Burger. -sticks tongue out- Deal with it!

Firstly, I would like to tell the tale of something HILLARIOUS that one of my Karate Students said to me Monday Night.
Background! As, any of you who actually care would know, I scratched my eye taking my contacts out and while back. So, I'm not allowed to wear them for awhile. Which means that I've been wearing my glasses a lot, obviously. Anyway, I went to Karate and was teaching as usual, two weeks til the next student test, so there are a lot of people coming in for reveiw, but other then that it was simply Karate as usual. And then I left with my brother and Izzy, cause she needed a ride home, and one of my students followed us out. Jason.
So just as we're getting into the car, Jason comes over to me and says, AND I QUOTE!
"Excuse me Ma'am, I noticed that those glasses make you look more intimidating."
Hahahahahaha!?!!!?!! This is all true. Anyway, I started at him for a moment or so and then said "Uhhh, thank you? I'll see you next week." 'Cause I mean, really, how does one respond to something like that?

Also, I would like for someone to please explain, how I can chop literally SIX INCHES of my hair off and have like only twelve people will notice. And yet, I stop wearing my contacts for a month and all of a sudden I'm hearing, "When did you get glasses?" every TEN MINUTES!?!! And the best part is that every single person that has asked me has seen my glasses before in the past. What the hell, does NO ONE pay attention to me?


Now, I would like to tell you all of the Dr. Phone Murderer Incident.


And I would like to start off by saying, I hate Girl Jeans! The pockets are wicked shallow and literally nothing stays inside them, as nearly any girl can testify too. So naturally, each and every time, I go to the bathroom or change my pants or sit down, I have to check my phone or it falls right out of my pocket! And I, being of razor sharp wit and clever reasoning, have just recently decided to start conteracting that as often as I remember too. Hahaha.


So! The other day when I went to the docter's office to be fingered by Cruella Deville and they had me change into that stupid gown thingy that they always make you wear, I took my phone out of my pocket and put it down on the exam table so that I wouldn't drop it on the floor. Smart Plan, right? Wrong. For after I changed into the stupid gown and the docter came back in, she moved the stupid peice of paper that they put on top the exam table and my phone was sent crashing to the floor.


Now, I have dropped that phone about NINETY EIGHT MILLION TIMES, and nothing has EVER happened to it before. And yet, for some baizarre reason, this time the stupid thing SHATTERED!?!! That's right, shattered. My screen now looks like somebody punched a stained glass window. It's fabulous really. So now, I'm stuck using my old pink razor. Which I find to be throughly awkward now, because my other phone was soooo much smaller and I don't have the nessicary symbols to make this, =^.^= face anymore. But it's whatever, I didn't lose any of my numbers. Which is good. Although, I am going to be super bummed if I lose all of my pictures from that phone. Infact, I may even cry if that's the case, because I had some many pictures of my Flashimus Maximus on that phone.....



And now, onto The FANTASTIC Adventures of CAPTAIN ELF BOY and BUBBLY CAT GIRL!?!!

Or at least that was the plan originally. As of right now however, I have decided that a happening of such EPIC proptions deserves a post of it's very own. WITH PICTURES!? ....IN TECHNICOLOR!?!! Soooo, you guys will just have to wait a bit longer to read about how EPICALLY EPIC AND HILLARIOUS and.... painfully lame I am. Hahaha. I mock your pain as if you really care. Ha!

Hair All Frizzed Out with Angry Thoughts

Alright. So, the other day, I was thinking about the last time that I listened to a friend prattle on and on about her stupid Girl Porn, a.k.a. Romance Novels. I'm fairly certian that the reason this conversation started was because I was hating all over Twilight and Werewolves in general, so naturally she began to tell me all about "Shifters" in the realm of super lame Girl Porn Novels.

Did you guys know that in the Universe of Girl Porn Novels, there are such things as Were-Bears and Were-Tigers and so on and so forth? How messed up is that? Honestly. Anyway, I am sitting there thinking 'What the phuck?' Because I realized almost immediately that in all of these stupid Girl Porn Stories about Shifters, they did not use a single animal that was not "Pretty" or "Sexy," if you know what I mean.

And honestly, how messed up is that? I mean really, I would looove to live in the Girl Porn Universe where ABSOLUTELY EVERYONE is inhumanly beautiful and powerful and mysterious and sexy and you never have to date any jerks because EVERYONE has a soul mate within a 5 miles radius of their house and he or she falls instantly in love with you, just because you exist. However, this is reality. Or what passes for reality in the Girl Porn Universe. And such madness does not happen!? It just doesn't. And in my, most expert opinion, if the "Gods" or "Genetic Reseachers" or whatever, were going to create such beings that they would and should naturally go for whatever animals possess the most extreme and well polished of survival traits on the planet. But clearly, that is not what happened here.

So, since the Girl Porn Universe is clearly not concerned about using animals with Genetic Superiority, I have decided to make a stand for less attractive animals by writting my own string of stories documenting the TOTALLY EPIC ADVENTURES of a bunch of highly unlikely, completely kick ass Shifters. Hahaha.

I haven't decided exactly what animals I'm going to use yet. But I know for a fact that I'm going to use the following,
-Angler Fish
-Skunk
-Plytapus
-Shark

Hahahaha. I'm also considering using,
Sloth, Emu, Walrus, Red Panda, Chipmunk, Crow, Fruit Bat, Tarantula, Poisonous Dart Frog.

Anyway, that's my super awesome, random post of the month. Enjoy it Dearies.

And All The Voices in My Head Have Every Right to Be There

WAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!?!!!

Guess who just bought tickets to see Alice Cooper!?

I did!

-happy dance-

YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!

VICTORY!?!!

And my seats are pretty good too!

^^

He's playing with Rob Zombie, who I am not a huge fan of but he certianly doesn't suck.

Which is a good thing.

Because he's playing with

ALICE FREAKIN COOPER!?!!
WAAAAHHH!