What About Feesel Day?

And too my cat Mittens I bequesth my entire, vast...

WHOSE READY FOR SOME MORE SILLINESS!?!!

Angel: Alright, so explain to me one more time. Why did you rip out Father Vincent's fillings?

Emma: -sigh- Because we need to sacrifice them to "God" on the alter, so that the stupid door will open and we can get down into the sewers and fight Lenard.

Angel: And what did Lenard ever do to us?

Emma: Nothing. But he's a big, evil monster and he's going to attack us as soon as we get down there anyway.

Angel: So then wouldn't the logical thing to do, be to avoid the sewers?

Blaise: Not in Silent Hill it wouldn't!?

Darnell: Wow. Is Angel actually trying to pass up an excuse to get into a fight for no reason? That's a first.

Angel: Nononono. I'm all for senseless violence and fighting for no reason. I'm just saying, wouldn't the logical thing to do, be to avoid the sewer all together?

Emma: -shrug- Probably. But if we do that, we'll never beat the game.

Angel:......THIS IS NOT A VIDEO GAME!?!!

Faust: -cell phone rings and the ringtone is the Whose Line is it Anyway, German Drinking Song- ....Hello? What? Lyserg! No no no, WE NEED THOSE SPINES DELIVERED IMMEDIATELY!?!!..... -hangs up-

Emma: What do you need spines for Faust?

Faust: I'm creating a brand new army of bone soldiers! -excited at first, then he sighs- Yoh destroyed my last one.... -sudden righteous fury- ALONG WITH MY BELOVED ELIZA'S SHIN BONES!?!!!

Emma: -nod nod- Yesh! I remember! That episode made me very angry!

Faust: Yesh. Me too. -Another big sigh- I wish I could kill him and be done with it...

Emma: Why can't you?

Faust: If I kill him then I'll be unemployed.

Emma: Yea. That would suck.

Blaise: -suddenly gasps- Ohmigosh!?!! Father Vincent, you've got a Negaverse in your tooth!

Father Vincent: -still annoyed- ..... A what?

Blaise: A Negaverse!

Krystal: -looks at it- Yea Blaise, your right. I guess it was a good thing we pulled your teeth out after all, huh Father?

Father Vincent: Yea....I guess? But I still hate you both.

Vlad: I wonder how that Negaverse got in there....?

Krystal: No idea.

Emma: I bet his dentist put it there. Right after he used the Jumpy Spider on him.... -dentist impression- Awww, he's a cute little psychopath. LET'S DRILL HIS FACE OFF!?!!

Nicademus: -suddenly stops walking- Hey guys, who is that? -points ahead-

Angel: -gasp- It's Angela!

Angela: -mumbling- And then I must move in with my enemy. And then I must wear my enemy's clothes...

Everyone: ANGELA!

Angela: -jumps and then looks around- Is someone calling me? I hear my name... Wait a minute. My name's not Stephen. looks around- Who the hell are you talking too?

Emma: Let's go say hi!

-Blaise and Emma run over to Angela-

Angela: -notices them and holds a duster buster to her own head- ONE STEP CLOSER AND I'LL HOOZERIZE YOU!?!!

Blaise: But... Sock! -holds up baby sock with little fishies on it-

Nicademus and Darnell: Awww, it's got little fishies on it!?!!

Angela: Sock...? IT'S A GOVERNMENT SPYING DEVICE!?!! EAT IT!

Vlad: Whaaaat?

Angela: Who are you!?

Emma: We are-

Angela: Who are you!?

Angel: We are-

Angela: WHO ARE YOU!?!!

Pyramid Head: -sigh- This is not a game of 'Who the Phuck are You!?'

Angela, these are my friends. Uh.... -doesn't remember their names-

Nicademus: Seriously...? You don't remember any of our names?

Angela: Pyramid Head! -tackle hugs- Nonononononono! Nonononononono! Look! -steals Xander's box-

Xander: Ah! My position has been compromised!

Angela: -puts box on her head- I'm Pyramid Head!

Nicademus: -tilts head to the side- You speak craziness Human.

Angela: And you eat like a lawn mower!?

Xander: -stealthily steals box back-

Angela: TORQUE SMACKEY!?!!! NOOOOOOO!?!!

Faust: Is she alright?

Pyramid Head: Yea. Sadly enough, this is normal.

Angela: -whips out a cue card and a pen- Autograph! To me, from you! Love you, Always,

Pyramid Head: -scribbles a little bit and hands the paper back-

Angela: No! More.

Pyramid Head: Uh... -scribbles some more-

Angela: -squeal- Thank you! -hides autographed cue card in her pants-

Emma: Oh wait! Maybe she can help us find the entrance to the sewers. I forgot to mark it on this spontaneously generated map of the area.

Vlad: Good thinking. Angela, do you know how to get to the sewers?

Angela: -huggles Pyramid Head- Why can't a guy but his girlfriend flame retardant sleepwear without it being about something?

Vlad: Ahhh.... I don't know.

Krystal: You bought her flame retardant pajamas?

Pyramid Head: SHE IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!?!!

Nicademus: Angela. Do you, or do you not, know where Leonard is?

Angela: HE WAS PLAYING ME LIKE YOU'D PLAY A FISH!?!! .....I can't make it any clearer then that, my fellow isosceles Americans. -pulls out huge butcher's knife- So, I stabbed him. Right through his chest. LIKE THIS!?!! REE REE REE REEE!?!! -stabs air- Stabbity stab stab. Inferior Human Organs.

Vlad: -backs up a little bit, then decides to hide behind Blaise-

Blaise: -frown- Why am I always the Meat Shield?

Vlad: Shut up. You know that Kitty is just gonna kill you in the end anyway.

Blaise: She wouldn't dare. -Unsure of himself- Would she? I mean, she loves me....right?

Me: -not actually here- OF COURSE I DO!?!! -voice over voice-

Angela: BOOT TO THE HEAD!?!! -throws boot straight up-

Vlad: And yet, every time that she feels like writing a tragic, overly dramatic love story, you are the one that dies. Not me.

Angel: Yea. Why is that? -super blunt- I mean, Blaise is kick ass and you barely have a personality....

Vlad: Ahhh..... -speechless-

Darnell: Well alrighty then...

Angela: BOOT TO THE HEAD!?!! -throws a boot at Darnell-

Krystal: -out of range- Alright. So, moving right along... does that mean that Leonard is already dead?

Pyramid Head: I doubt it.

Angela: -notices Angel and Krystal holding hands- One of the brides!?!! Is that what you say at a lesbian wedding?! One of the brides?! Cause I just don't know. The mannish one! The pants one! You! -points at Angel- Is she a bride?! Cause I don't know. And you won't know unless you ask! You won't know!?!!

Angel: .... I'm not mannish. Butch maybe. But definitely not "Mannish." ....Whatever that means.

Krystal: And we're both wearing pants.

Darnell: .......Can we tranquilize her?

Angela: And another boot to the head for Jenny and the Wimp. -throws boots at Blaise and Vlad-
Nicademus: I wonder which one is Jenny....?

Faust: Obviously it's Blaise.

Blaise: I think... that I resent that comment.

Angel: Well played.

Krystal: Golf Claps.

Angel and Krystal: -golf claps-

Darnell: Whatever.

Angela: BOOT TO THE HEAD! -throws boots at everyone-

Darnell: -ducks- Let's move on then, shall we?

Blaise and Vlad: @_@

Emma: I HAVE BEEN CONCUSSED!?!!

Nicademus: Man up, you guys. They're just combat boots.

Angela: I WAS ONCE ..... A MAN!?!!

Faust: But your a woman.

Father Vincent: No, she's Bat Crap Crazy.

Angela: You've got Head Pigeons. -tilts head to the side-

Faust: What!?! -panic- Where!?!!

Angela: Business in the front. Infidel in the back.

Darnell: -starts walking away- I'm leaving!

Blaise: I guess we should follow him, huh?

Krystal: .....Does he know where he's going?

Emma: Does he ever? But somehow we always get there. -follows him-

TWENTY MINUTES LATER, WE FIND OUR COURAGEOUS HERO'S IN AN EXAMINATION ROOM COMPLETE WITH A CREEPY MAKE SHIFT ALTER, MADE OUT OF A COT. WITH BLOOD SPLIT ALL OVER THE COT AND AN OLD TORN UP TEXT BOOK AND A PICTURE OF PYRAMID HEAD POSING LIKE A ROCK STAR WITH THE MEMBERS OF QUEEN, ALAN RICKMAN AND A TIGER!?!!

Nicademus: -looks at Blaise- So what do we do now?

Blaise: Sacrifice the Father's teeth to Pyramid Head!

Emma: Yea!

Father Vincent: But he's standing right there. -points at Pyramid Head, who is giving Angela a piggy back ride- I don't see why, we couldn't have just handed them too him.

Emma: Because that's not how you do it in the game.

Angel: THIS IS NOT A VIDEO GAME!?!!

Angela: Yea! And you are NOT a dwarf unless you are in direct possession of a battle axe!?! You tell me the elf took it? I don't believe you.

Father Vincent: -shrugg- Then again, I still don't understand WHY THE HELL you took my fillings in the first place. -mumble, mumble, random misplaced rage and shouting- I mean, I don't want to get caught between Attila the Hun and Jaws here, but this seems a little retarded...
Blaise: -rolls eyes- Such Skeptics.... -throws the fillings on the alter-

And ...............nothing happens!?!!

Faust: Whaaaaat?

Darnell: Are you freaking kidding me?

AND THEN SUDDENLY THE FLOOR DISAPPEARS UNDERNEATH THEM AND EVERYONE FALLS!?!!

Angela: Look Charlie! I'm a bird!? -starts swimming through the air- I'M A ROCKET SHIP!?!!

Pyramid Head: ...... Shyt.

Everyone Else: AHHHHHHH!?!! -screaming bloody murder-

Ten minutes later, screaming has subsided.

Vlad: -looks at Blaise- WE'RE STILL FALLING!?!!

And the screaming begins once again.

Then, sometime later, our heroes land in the sewers. And they dust themselves off and after some bitching and moaning, they begin to venture through the sewers in search of Lenard.

Xander: -scowling and holding his cardboard box high over his head- I never saw James Bond in rats or poop. Let alone rats AND poop.

Darnell: There are no rats in here.

Xander: Lookit that rat! -sigh- I can't even roll around in here.... Oh look, a rat riding a piece of poop.

Lenard: -suddenly appears in the water- RAWR!!?! I HAS MONSTER!?! LOL! DIE HEATHER!?!! -attacks-

BABABABABABABABABOOOM!?!! TUNE SOMETIME IN THE FUTURE TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS TO OUR COURAGEOUS HERO'S IN THE CONCLUSION OF THIS RIDICULOUS JOURNEY!?!!